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Don’t Eat That; It’s Poison!!

Don’t Eat That; It’s Poison!
Brett Klika, C.S.C.S.

As you know, the following foods are poison and if you eat them, you will explode:

1. Meat because of saturated fat, poor quality (hormones, etc) and animals are cute
2. Milk and dairy products because of lactose, hormones, and questionable bioavailability of nutrients
3. Eggs because fat and cholesterol can kill you
4. Fruit because of the fructose sugar
5. Grains because of gluten sensitivity and poor nutrient value
6. Beans because of digestive interference
7. Any form of food that has been processed in any way because it will interfere with your metabolism.
8. Anything with sugar because it will give you diabetes
9. Anything with saturated fat because it’s bad
10. Water out of the faucet because it’ contaminated
11. Wild fish because of mercury
12. Farmed fish because of chemical treatments, hormones, and tainted food supply
13. Soy because it’s genetically modified and can negatively impact your hormone levels
14. Starchy vegetables like carrots because they are high on the glycemic index
15. Everything else in the last over-the-top documentary I saw or book I read

So what does that leave us? Maybe some organic, locally grown Kale. No one has zeroed in on that yet. Of course, you should probably go on a field trip and examine the seeds the Kale came from in addition to ordering a soil sample of the area in which it was grown to ensure maximal purity. Probably should make sure the farmer is of the proper ethical, religious, and genealogical tree necessary to produce consumable food as well.

Madness!!! Our nutritional culture in America exists under two guises:
1. Open your mouth, shove in whatever is closest to appease an immediate
neurochemical addiction.
2. Adhere by a single nutritional ideology often designed to conform to a
charismatic, outspoken individual’s personal agenda. Regardless of practicality or sustainability, attempt to fit this ideology to every nutritional need both for yourself and others.

This has succeeded in making one of the basic human need of eating a confusing, perilous novelty.

Eating is not a novelty! You must eat or you will die. Our need for food is identical to our car’s need for gas; in both quantity and quality. No gas, no go. Bad gas, bad go. It’s pretty simple.

In our society, however, all you need is a 3 cent sticker by your car’s gas tank instructing “premium fuel only” to ensure the owner will utilize only put the highest quality gas in the vehicle. Gas pump in one hand, supersized cheeseburger in the other.

With all the conflicting and restricting information available on nutrition, how can one tell what constitutes “premium fuel” when it comes to food? One man’s rocket fuel can be another man’s lawn mower gas.

I recommend the 3-step approach of think, act, and feel to determine what foods work best for you. For more information on this, I’d recommend Sean Croxton’s The Dark Side of Fat Loss (

Educate yourself. No, not by watching a one-sided, agenda-laden documentary or reading a similar book. Read a lot of books from varying approaches. Get your hands on actual human-based research with large, large populations (results from a population of 15 hung-over college students does not imply a scientific “truth”).

Where does the food you eat come from? What’s in it? How is it produced? Do you know what each ingredient on the ingredients list is? Could you spell them in a spelling bee? Are large companies motivated to produce food for quality, or profit?

I’m not a “profit is evil” guy. I’m quite the opposite. However, you do have to acknowledge economics when assessing the quality of your food. The truth is, real food items are expensive to produce, chemicals are not. There are a lot of hungry people so food companies need to maximize production and minimize associated costs.

Additionally, our population needs food on a consistent basis year round. Real food is err to the climate, soil quality, amount of land available for growth, and other natural plights of nature. Large food producers can’t risk a bad crop, disease, or any other limit to production. They stack the odds in their favor by hormone-ing, preserving, chemical-ing antibiotic-ing, etc.

With our limitless demands, limited resources, and general notion of entitlement (give me something but I don’t want to work or pay for it), this is the only way to guarantee consistent, affordable food for the masses. As resources are under a never-ending continued strain, this process will only get more extreme as time goes on. Less food, more chemical.

Does the above process create the best food for you to eat? If we want premium fuel, what would logic dictate as the best food choices? If you were to compare a small piece of grass-fed beef or a few whole eggs that you are familiar with the origins of and man has ate since the dawn of time to a plate of frozen “non-fat” soy giblets flavored and engineered to look like dinosaurs, which would you chose?
I’m not a judge, I’m just asking. Which do you think could lead to greater problems in our nation’s health?

Educate yourself and decide what you are comfortable feeding you and your family most of the time. Whatever your decision is, stick with it as much as you can. When you can’t, it’s not the end of the world. Prevalent, not occasional behavior is what will shape your health.

In my opinion, when it comes to pollution, none is worse than the CO2 expelled from someone saying they are going to do something, then don’t do it. Acting on a belief is hard, especially if it’s a new belief or revelation. It takes forethought, discipline, energy, and commitment.

Due to the over-prevalence of inferior choices, eating for quality does require more of a process than “me hungry, must swallow stuff”. You may have to do some research and select food producers or stores you feel comfortable with. You will have to spend some time to prepare your food. Be ready to allocate some financial resources when you’re going for higher quality food as well.

In the situations where practicality reigns, making a better food choice may mean comparing two different snacks and going with the one with the shorter ingredients list. It may also mean “my friend is going to a chain restaurant for their birthday dinner so I’m going to go, eat, have fun, and keep my mouth shut about how nutritionally Pius I am”.

Unless our friends have birthdays every day or our lack of planning results in “which one is less bad” decisions every time we eat, these “blips” in a nutritional program are inconsequential. Remember prevalent, not occasional behavior is what shapes your health.

Start to pay attention to how the food you eat makes you feel. What foods make you gassy, tired, agitated, inflamed, etc. Also, what foods give you energy, focus, and the metabolism you want. Like a car, you do need to drive it to assess the quality of the fuel. Establish a relationship between what you eat, what you do, and how you feel.

That morning sluggishness, afternoon heartburn, 3 p.m. crash, and sleepless evening do not have to be daily human plights. Much like you don’t fix a leak in the sink buy buying a bigger bailing bucket, you’re not going to fix health problems you’ve created by getting more and more powerful drugs (caffeine, sleeping pills, antacids, etc.) Fix the leak, not the bailing bucket.

To determine what the best nutritional approach is for you; think, act and feel. Remember “premium fuel only” for optimal performance. Put that 3 cent sticker by your mouth if necessary. It will save you thousands, if not more. Never forget to enjoy life. Use your nutritional paradigm to guide, not indoctrinate you. Inspire, don’t condemn others!

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